A lot of things have labels. A lot of things need labels. I like labels on merchandise but not so much on people. People do not need labels. None of us need them and none of us deserve to have them assigned by another, especially those who don’t know us or anything about our world or our reality. Goth is a label. It’s not necessarily a bad label, as labels go, but it encompasses a wide range of lifestyles that should not mistakenly be attributed to such a vast number of people just because of their color preference for hair, fashion, taste in music, etc.
I love Goth fashion. It’s one of my secret fantasies…to, even for one day, wear the goth ensemble of my dreams. A dream that will most likely go unfulfilled since it doesn’t fit in with my lifestyle. Halloween, maybe? No, that’s insulting. The Goth dresses,tops and bottoms that I have fallen in love with should never be treated as a costume but more like a cherished work of art. These are a few of my favorites…
BoneChurch Gothic @ www.jeannienitro.com
and www.cruella.ca
The first little pink number is my favorite…despite the pink. I’ve heard that pink is not labelled as goth, though.
My love of Goth fashion led me to wonder about other Goth related things, including people. Anybody who has been to the mall on a Friday or Saturday Night has seen the teens, dressed in black with black hair, black make-up and usually hanging out somewhere near the Hot Topic store. I’m inclined to believe that this group is comprised of rebelling teens more than anything else so in my quest for knowledge I decided to go elsewhere. But where? I asked a few people, still in college, but none of them had any Goth friends or knew of a source that might lead to a face-to-face interview. So I turned to the Web and it was as easy as typing the word “Goth” into my search engine. Wikipedia has an in-depth article that left me more confused than anything else. I visited a few other sites that turned out to be more of a dating service…again, not what I was looking for. After a few more tries I stumbled across the Goth Community on MySpace. At least that’s how it’s listed. I paged through quite a few profile pictures before feeling drawn to one in particular. I believe these feelings happen for a reason so I contacted the person by message to ask if they would be interested in enlightening myself and others by sharing some things about their life and lifestyle. She so graciously agreed and while our contact was entirely email to email it felt quite personal in the warm and friendly manner in which she shared little pieces of her life. Her life is her own and she is only representative of herself.
Meet…. “Teh Doll”
Yes, “Teh”…not “the”
It’s a nickname used as her alias. Teh Doll lives in Florida and is married to her soul mate. They were married one Friday the 13th and have an ever growing deep and passionate love for one another.
She is a Graphic Artist one semester shy of her degree and plans on finishing soon but right now loves no job more than being a stay at home Mom to her two children.
Like any Mother she is very protective of her kids and very careful who she allows in their life.
She loves dark colors by nature and is proud to profess that she never hung out with the stereotypical Mall crowd as a teenager. Her hair color is black by choice because she feels it suits her the most and it has been that color since sometime in the year 2000. Being the proud mother of two she no longer gets to dress exactly as she would choose everyday but it does usually include the color black. Her choice in fashion would be doll-like, a Lolita style dress with knee socks and MaryJane platforms. If she could make a wish in the clothes department it would be for a closet full of little cute dollsy dresses. Add some black liquid eye-liner and a hair bow and she’s ready for the town. She states that “I’ve never really considered myself as Goth, just as….me.” She did, in earlier days, attend weekly “Goth Nights” at Clubs for dancing and cocktails.
She has quite a few tattoos. Her 4 year old loves them and wants one for herself but Teh Doll laughs and tells her she will have to wait until she turns 18. ( I am a fan of Kat Von D and my six year old occasionally watches LA INK with me and wants one as well so I can relate) Her 4 year old also says she wants to be like Mommy when she grows up and this makes her smile, as it would any mother, but what she wants for her children is happiness and tells them they can be anything that they want and will be allowed and encouraged to choose for themselves as they grow older.
Some of her favorite things, other than her family, are tea, sushi and board games. She loves baking cupcakes and collects dolls.
Teh Doll likes all kinds of music from 80’s collections and the INX to HIM, PLACEBO, DEATH STARS, and the CURE, to name a few…but just isn’t a fan of anything country. She loves the darker things in life…meaning that if she had to choose between a pink bunny and a black bat…she would choose the bat. Her background in graphic arts has given her a love for what some would consider creepy…coffin, spider/spider web clip art but states that when confronted with real life spiders it makes her cringe. She loves “making things pretty” and photography. She believes in God as a Higher Power.
Teh Doll notes that she has been told by everyone that she is scary and intimidating until they talk to her. She remembers how many dirty looks she has received from people based on her looks. She does admit to having toned down her appearance a little, a few less piercings and a tamer hair style. It was harder to find jobs in the past with the number of tattoos but feels this is changing with the times as the look becomes more prevalent.
She finds it funny that now, with her two blue-eyed, blond-haired beauties in tow, that the dirty looks quickly turn to smiles and compliments of her little brood. Otherwise, Teh Doll had absolutely nothing negative to say about anyone or anything. She describes her family as “Wondertastic”. “I am comfortable in my skin and happy with who I am from the inside out. I love my life =).”
I don’t think life can get much better than that and I wish her, and her family, the best. I would like to thank her again for so graciously sharing a part of her life and personal photographs at the whim of a stranger. The photos, I might add, are stunning. Kudos to Teh Doll for having her own badge of courage….without a trip to Oz.
Mind's Eye 
